Jerry Fowler’s Greatest Challenge

June 17th through June 24th

From Jerry:  There have been hundreds of calls, emails and cards of thanks for sharing what happens in a cancer victim’s life. If you need me to talk or communicate with one of your loved ones or friends please email me at jerry@jerryfowler.com

All updates from the first day are chronicled on my web site at www.jerryfowler.com.  Just click “Medical Updates” for a complete diary from week one.  One can visit each week for the weekly update by clicking on the latest week or read the entire series by beginning at week 1.

Thursday 6-21-2007. Finally I was back to normal after the last Chemo treatment.  The accumulative effect of Chemo can be very difficult to take.  There seems to me more and more effects as the number of Chemo treatments occur.

For those living with a cancer patient please keep in mind that the person dealing with cancer and Chemo or radiation  are dealing with a lot of psychological  turmoil as well as physical turmoil.  Psychologically the patient feels as if they are a failure. Combine this with the physical draining of energy and stamina and that person has a bundle of problems.

That’s why this week I would like to talk about the CAREGIVERS. The American Heritage Dictionary defines caregiver as the following:
 
An individual, such as a parent, foster parent, or head of a household, who attends to the needs of a child or dependent adult.

I have learned from my cancer support group that there are different levels of care giving. Many of the caregivers are the spouses of the cancer victims and the caregivers really have a difficult time dealing with the cancer patient.  Not only are they required to cook, run the household, arrange doctor appointments, fill prescriptions, remind the patient when and how to take pills, when to take physical therapy, make sure the person is driven to and from the doctors offices, how and what not to do but they also must deal with the emotions of the victim.
 
I have met with some very emotional victims who feel sorry for themselves constantly. I call this the “Why me” syndrome.  They go through the entire process feeling like they are being punished by God or who knows what other forces.  This emotional state is very difficult on the caregiver.  The caregiver loves and respects the victim and often times the victim treats the caregiver with little respect.  I hear some awful stories as I talk with many people in this situation.

The caregiver goes through much more than the cancer victim psychologically and they never seem to get a break from the everyday ordeal of dealing with such devastating circumstances. I have often wondered why there are not more support groups for those loving people we call caregivers.  They are angels and many times are responsible for the recovery of the cancer patient. Sadly they seem to be the least appreciated.

When you are communicating with the family affected by cancer,  volunteer to stay with the patient and give the caregiver a break from their every day routine.  This will be appreciated more than you will ever know.  In my talking with dozens of different people I find that the victim will treat a friend much better than the caregiver. The caregiver is someone the person affected with cancer loves and how many times have we heard that we should treat family as friends rather than take them for granted.
 
If you need me to talk to any of your friends who suffer from what I am talking about please email me and let’s make arrangements.

Tomorrow 6-26-2007 I go in for X-Rays to see where this cancer is and how we must proceed.  I have another Chemo treatment scheduled for the 3th of July and hopefully this will be the last one.  Your prayers are appreciated.

I fully expect the tumor to be gone and cancer a part of my history.  Tell your cancer victim to stop using the word HOPE and replace it with belief.  I believe I will be healed is much better than the word, HOPE I will be healed.  Talk to your cancer victim as if they are free and clear of cancer and replace all those negative self talk words which can bring one down.
  
Above all please don’t share stories with someone suffering from cancer about your mom or brother who died with cancer after a long battle. Those stories are very discouraging to someone trying to battle such adversities.
 
I hope something I have written will help you understand the many facets a cancer victim and their caregives experiences. 

You can follow my story through my website each week.  We do not post the latest weeks update until Saturday morning after the article has been published in the newspapers.
 
Special thanks to Rod Shealy, owner of The New Irmo News, The Northeast News, The Lake Murray News and the Cayce/West Columbia News for making my story availing to all the readers in those areas.

Jerry Fowler
6-25-2007

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